The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize