All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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