U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize