Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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