Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Farmville is her only friend.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
