ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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