she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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