I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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