I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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