I love watching others lives come down to our level.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I still have a little drunk in my system
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
