was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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