addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
