she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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