I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize
