Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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