She is in my trunk
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Randomize