hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
