you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Randomize