I just made out with a guy for $7.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Randomize
