you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
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