Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
