On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
