we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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