Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
