i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
