Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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