Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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