This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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