I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
