everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
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