She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize