I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
