My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
