He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
