is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
