question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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