What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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