That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
