You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
