I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
barbara walters just said penis...
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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