She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize