My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
