Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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