Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
