Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Randomize
