We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
