my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize