We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
