It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
