called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
