thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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