Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
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