I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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