Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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